Mr T. 2:01 Thu Dec 29
I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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46 years of age - about time I gave it a go.
Any tips?
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Replies - Newest Posts First ( Show In Chronological Order)
goose
1:03 Wed Jan 4
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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Beards are so 2014.
Grow a moustache or beard-stache they are the future.
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gank
12:47 Wed Jan 4
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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There really is no end to the list of problems people will bring to this website.
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Cheezey Bell-End
3:43 Tue Jan 3
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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Suddenly she relates to the problem.
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stomper
3:23 Tue Jan 3
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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Trust me Nurse, it doesnt work unless you trim it like a Swedish plumber in a 70's porn movie
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Nurse Ratched
2:58 Tue Jan 3
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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Have you tried aiming your bolus at the inside of your mouth, as opposed to the outside/perimeter?
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stomper
2:54 Tue Jan 3
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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Nurse Ratched
The moustache and beard tend to cover your mouth, so bits of everything you eat gets stuck in the beard. I'm reaching the stage that I roam around displaying my last meal to the world.
On the other hand one could regard the food thus caught as a handy snack.
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stomper
2:44 Tue Jan 3
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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LeroysBoots 3:04 Thu Dec 29
Head and shoulders!
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Nurse Ratched
2:28 Tue Jan 3
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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Shoosh.
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Gruesome Dump
2:19 Tue Jan 3
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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Nurse Ratched 6:19
I also knocked a glass of Jager (or however you spell it) over a man I was with in Wetherspoons.
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This is true.
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mallard
9:52 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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Nurse Ratched 9:38 Thu Dec 29
Ha! - that cracked me up
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lowermarshhammer
9:41 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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I have only made it past the 10 day itchy bastard phase once.
Lasted a month.
Looked like a scruffy wannabe hipster twat.
got rid PRONTO
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Nurse Ratched
9:38 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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My handbag was on the ground and I bounced my chair leg inside its 'loop' as I shuffled my chair closer to the table. Got up to use the powder room and it snared my foot. Fell almost flat on my face in a crowded room. I hadn't even finished my first glass at that point.
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riosleftsock
9:35 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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"Strap of my handbag" = vicious tongue
"Restaurant" = Crystal-meth clinic.
Just wanted to get in there before Frankie and co.
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mallard
9:33 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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"tripped over the strap of my handbag in a restaurant."
Ha! Ha! - Can you kindly elaborate on that incident
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Nurse Ratched
9:30 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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;-)
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joe royal
9:26 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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Nurse Ratched 6:23 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
I got it.
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Lertie Button
6:55 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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Girls, girls let's not fall out over napkin use, all I'll say in my defence is I know why in those Victorian dramas they are the size of tablecloths.
Anyway the wife loves my beard cause it makes me look like an old codger and for the first time I'm invisible to younger women.
A lot less hassle for me too
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Willtell
6:25 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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No!? Don't follow your drift Nurse....
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Nurse Ratched
6:23 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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Married yours, didn't you?
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Willtell
6:22 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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Tripped over your beard did you Nurse?
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Nurse Ratched
6:19 Thu Dec 29
Re: I am growing a beard and have never had one before
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Dabbed daintily at the corner of my lips, more for effect than necessity. I know where my mouth is, after all.
(Seriously, what is so difficult about this process?)
However, I have in the past, stabbed myself in the lips with a fork, and tripped over the strap of my handbag in a restaurant.
I also knocked a glass of Jager (or however you spell it) over a man I was with in Wetherspoons.
There is a limit to my feminine elegance.
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